The Quiet Brain

I am dating the Wolverine. He has an X-men name and I think his super power is silencing my brain. I keep waiting and waiting and waiting for that moment-that inevitable moment-when my insecurities go on overdrive and I freak out on the person that I'm dating. But it seems like whenever I am around him that all of that gets set aside and I can concentrate on talking with him.

I haven't quite figured out how he does it, this furry force field of his. Trying to decide if it is some sort of mind game. You know, like a trick to make me think that there is no reason to be insecure and crazy.

Here's the thing though: my gut says, "Trust this man." HHmmmmm...I haven't trusted anyone in a very long time. I'm not even scared to trust him. Curse his superpowers! My defenses are non-existent with him, and honestly, they always have been. I remember when I first started talking to him months and months ago telling him really sensitive personal things. I don't feel a need to hide from him.

So, he may not be perfect. But who is, right? As long as our mutual weirdnesses line up, I think it should be fine.

Its all so different. Its not like being with Fuzzy Face which was wild and exciting. And its not like being with the Right Wing King where I never felt comfortable or good enough. How I feel when I am with Wolverine is similar to what happens to setting fire to a shot of whiskey: it burns slowly and evenly.

I feel weird talking about him. I still feel like I want to protect all of this and keep it for myself. As if I talk about this relationship the bubble will burst and he'll be gone too.

Is this love? I'm not sure yet. I think it could head in that direction. I can see Wolverine holding my hand through a lupus crisis. I can see myself getting ticked off at him for beating me at Scrabble all the damn time. Or listening to music all night...

For now I will sit and wonder about my quiet brain and how he accomplishes that. Scary quiet in there...